(Pre)Judging is Easy While Understanding is Not.

On November 30th, 2009, we heard this surprising  (yet sad) news about people who committed suicide in malls. With it, came along other people’s wide-ranging opinions. Some of them were sincere, telling their condolences, some of them were confused with the reasons, some of them did judge, even got irritated and mad for the news, and some of them are just insensitive enough to made fun of  it. For these kind of people, well, i don’t know, maybe they just don’t get it, maybe they just don’t understand.

But who does? I know I don’t.

The thing is, the incidents  (or whatever people may call it) put me back into a year ago. Reminds me of something, someone, who’s kinda special to me. Who’s special to most of psychology UI students, especially those who belong to the class of 2005, and some who did touched by this person; this very wonderful girl’s heart, and everything she did to us, while she were still around. So it was kinda sad for me to hear people saying those (pre)judging about the malls accidents.

I, myself, who use to be a psychology student, which usually judged by people to understand this kinda problem(s) better than other people who don’t take psychology as a subject to learn, don’t really have anything to say besides my deepest condolence for the family who’s being left. Since, hey, we don’t really know what was going on, right? Hence, we can’t and must not say much of it. At least, that’s what I think.

Well, this one, this heart-touching post came from my brilliant friend, Disa, tells about the incidents, and how she feels about it :

Stop judging dead people, will you?

Katanya mereka bunuh diri. Loncat dari lantai 5 dua buah mall besar ibukota, lalu mati. Cerita yang sama dengan seorang perempuan hebat yang meninggal kurang lebih setahun yang lalu. Kejadian yang serupa. Pertanyaan-pertanyaan yang serupa. Tuduhan yang serupa. Simpati yang serupa.

Hujatan yang serupa.

Kenapa harus bunuh diri? Bunuh diri itu dosa. Kenapa harus loncat di dalam mall? Kenapa tak atap gedung sekalian. Kenapa menyusahkan?

Mereka sudah mati. Tak akan ada jawabannya. Kenapa menyusahkan diri sendiri?

Orang hidup yang percaya Tuhan pasti tahu bunuh diri itu dosa. Mereka juga pernah hidup, berarti mereka tahu (kalau percaya Tuhan). Tapi manusia butuh orang lain. Untuk peduli, untuk membantu, untuk mencegah. Sebelum mati, bukan sesudah mati.

Kenapa tidak mencari tempat sepi supaya tak ada yang menyadari? Karena mereka ingin dihentikan, sadar atau tidak sadar. Mereka ingin mati, tapi lebih ingin mendapat keinginan hidup sebelum benar-benar mati. Begitu kata seorang ahli.

Biar Tuhan saja yang menghakimi. Toh nanti yang jadi terdakwa bukan mereka saja. Kita juga.


They wanted to be listened, to be cared, to be understood.

It doesn’t take any psychologist to care for our surroundings.

The thing is, would you care enough?

You could read more about ‘committing suicide’ on ruangpsikologi.com.

– D! –


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